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Fighting immigration issues, battling bridesmaids, and planning the wedding of my (our) dreams!

Thursday, September 2, 2010

Tradition vs. Us

It's amazing how many awesome ideas you get turned onto when you enter the wedding (and blogging) world! All of these incredible DIY projects, things I must have, and cool-as-pie ideas to incorporate our distinct personality as a couple. So the biggest fight for Mr. Tango and I has been ...(cue loud beaming voice and drum roll)... Tradition vs. Us.

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I know we're not alone. Some recent, somewhat related posts are from Miss Stripes, Mrs. Veggie, and Miss Plaid - to name a few.

Here's the deal-y-o: Panamanians are notorious for strong Catholic backgrounds, long-standing traditions, and believing in stereotypes. I am notorious for my lack thereof. (Examples: I wear heels when I play football. I was in the Christian a capella group and held monthly body shot nights. I used to show dogs while getting my MPA. The list can go on). Nobody in my family is religious, and I decided to get baptized/confirmed on my own when I was 18.

I want: a personal ceremony done by a friend involving songs/readings that are meaningful to us.
His family wants: a long traditional one including all the bells and whistles. (No lie - when they found out we were having a ceremony on the beach, they brainstormed all the ways to bring an organ or piano out there to play our music. They also want bells for people to ring).

I want: funky favors, bare feet, and personal touches.
They want: formal, frilly, classy decor.

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Mr. Tango wants - Well, he's pretty ambivalent towards everything :)

So how can we combine these in the best possible way? For starters: compromise. We're having a wedding on the beach. We'll probably use more traditional music. We're going to have elegant decor with fun touches (e.g. the crosswords). We'll have some traditional elements (bouquet toss, cake cutting, first dance), but incorporate our personalities into them (no waltz for the first dance). We'll have a priest conduct the ceremony, but personalize it as much as possible.

And... I'm okay with all of that. As much as a wedding is about us, it's also about those who are important to us. We know we'll be happy no matter what on our big day, so it's nice to make sure they are happy too.

How are you incorporating traditions (or not)? Have you had to make compromises?

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